Another letter from a wonderful friend, father, and husband

This was sent to me by a great friend in response to a post that sometimes I just don't want to live anymore. Thankfully I don't feel the same way anymore. There is times when I feel so sick and in so much pain that death to me is much more enticing than pressing foreword. Thank you Tim for you encouragement and insight-fullness. My life and Phil's life are much richer because of you and your family. Laura is an angel to me and Faith is so loving and I can't help but to smile when she is around. Thank you for sharing Mikkie's legacy with us and I love you all!


Derin-
I hear you sister. There have been times when I've wanted to die, especially recently. A big part of us thought "lucky" when we heard about the possibility that you're going to get to make the journey from this mortal life soon.

Anyways, sorry people say things to make you feel sad. I think people think of death as something horrible. While it is horrible because of the time we have to spend apart as a result, ultimately I see death as an exciting journey. Is that weird? Maybe it is. People think it's better down here? Their insane. This is the period where we experience bitterness, pain, illness, etc. The only thing keeping me here are the people I love, otherwise I'd be excited to make the journey. If God signaled me and told me "Tim, you're time is about up, here's a disease to take you back to me", I'd be excited. Maybe I would see things differently when going through it though... because it must suck to live in so much physical pain every day (can attest to emotional pain :( it makes me want to die).

I'd tell you to hang in there, but you already are :). Laura and I were both extremely impressed at your gregarious nature. It stands out as one of your big strengths. If you're indeed chosen to make the journey in a few months as I understand your prognosis was (was it?), then you'll need to go find our Mikkie and give her a big hug and say "Hi I was your mommy and daddy's friend". That would be cool of you to do, I'd appreciate it. Too bad people can't update their facebook pages on the other side. Would be awesome to see what they're up to.

But, if it's not your time, well, I'll encourage you to keep on living :) Not within my abilities to know or judge when our days of probation are coming to an end.

Hasta pronto,

Tim